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  1. Yes, exactly; I’m glad you caught that. I know I’m guilty myself of obsessing over negative responses to my creativity, while simultaneously nearly casually dismissing positive ones as not being truly sincere. It’s silly, but it’s also a hard habit to break.

  2. I was having a bit of disagreement for a moment, in response to the above quote about memory matching the image of the self, and if it does not, then it is forgotten.

    And then I reread the line, and thought about it again, and realized that my initial interpretation of the sentiment was that we always cherry pick and only remember the best things about our lives. And that’s not what the writer was saying, I can see that now. ‘Image of the self’ is a key component, here.

    If we are the sort to jump up and down on ourselves over the things that we have done wrong, the mistakes we have made, then of course, we will remember the untidy parts of our lives quite clearly. Self-serving memory does not always mean *positive* memory.

  3. Ouch; I’m so sorry, Rick. Well, regarding the maintenance of memory, I guess I’d recommend what I was told by a very wise woman who was very much at peace with herself, and wasn’t worried that others in her family might have different or conflicting memories: what helps you live better? What works best for you? It’s you, after all, and not anyone else that has to live your life.

  4. I had a very vivid realization of the mutability of memory a few months ago. One night, while struggling to sleep, I suddenly and violently was back in my mother’s hospital room watching her die. But I noticed that, in the midst of trying to shut off the persistent and far too vivid memory, some of the details had changed subtly. Her hair was no longer missing in places, her face no longer slack and rubbery. My brain was trying to paint a beatific scene of peaceful passing, rather than the horror of what I had actually seen. Some tell me to just let that happen, while I rail against letting my mind change the memory to soothe my own soul ache. It is an…interesting…conundrum.

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