So no, I don’t think women like assholes better. I think it’s more they believe they don’t deserve any better, or they’re buying into societal myths about who they must be. They don’t feel they can even ask the right guy without scaring him off… and due to shyness or whatever, the nice guys aren’t making their interest known, and are spooked by nice girls who ask them first.
We know this on some level — we helped create the rubric. We are society. If we don’t like it, it falls upon us to change it — not to just wander around plaintively bleating, “poor us, why don’t any nice girls like us — instead of the mean guys who make us feel inadequate?”
Yes, that was unkind. But think about it: aren’t we yet sick of asking such a stupid question? Aren’t we tired yet of the peculiar and stifling gender roles it implies? Isn’t it time to dump such restrictive roles for something better, healthier, and more fun for both genders?
I think sometimes folks don’t seem to realize it is possible to find the right person — as long as you’re patient, and not afraid to ignore the usual societal/media based restrictions. Our societal roles are finally changing, thank goodness, as is demonstrated by the current confusion as to who should ask whom… but that’s a possible issue for another column.